When you have two children you have to share your attention. When i fell pregnant the second time I had no idea how i was going to cope with two children. How was i supposed to share my love of my first child with another baby? Quite a few other mums have said the same thing. My eldest daughter did find it hard to begin with and still does to this day! Every child wants ALL the attention but when you have two, you just can't. You have to share it - no choice! When the baby is newborn, the newborn is most likely to get most of the attention with feeds, winding and comforting, where the toddler/other child doesn't understand that part. When Elliw was a bit older I would have to let her feed herself in the bouncy chair or put a pillow under the bottle for her to feed as Mia would sometimes play up since she wasn't getting the attention from me.
If you think having one child is expensive - then having two is much more expensive! I was actually quite shocked how expensive it was. I really do regret not breastfeeding Elliw. I was in two minds but i ended up bottle feeding her. That would have saved us more money. Also Mia was still in nappies at the time (and only just come out) so we were buying our normal food shop and the things we needed, clothes for the children, 2 packs of different sized nappies, wet wipes (double the amount) and milk powder for Elliw. I would advise that whoever is going to be a parent to a 2nd child, to save money and budget. When we started weaning Elliw we did food from scratch for her so it wasn't too expensive with feeding once she was off the milk. But still to this day, we go through 4 or 5 pack (used to be 6 or more) of wet wipes a week and a pack of nappies (with Elliw) a week, so it's still quite pricey!
As from my previous posts you probably know I think having a routine for a child is very important. That is why i couldn't wait to put Elliw into a routine. We found it much harder with Elliw, as Mia was in a routine by 3-4 months as for Elliw she wouldn't settle into a routine until she was around 7-8 months. You lose alot of sleep when you're a mother of two. Elliw had colic first few weeks which lasted 10pm until 2-3am and then woke up 5am for another feed and then Mia would wake up 7am so as you probably can tell I was shattered (Iwan works 7.30am every weekday) I made the most of it when the girls had their nap but now Elliw will have a nap once a day and Mia, well she's up all day with no naps! I am quite lucky that the girls go to bed 6-6.30pm for us every day though.
Sadly i've lost a lot of friends since i've become a mother of two children. No idea how and no idea why. But i've still got my close friends around me, even though I don't see my friends often, i know they're still there for me. When you have two children you don't really have that much time to yourself anymore, only in the evening when they're sleeping! (if they do! If they don't then i feel SO sorry for you!!!!) Some days it gets too much, those are the days usually when they are both in a bad mood, which then gets me in a bad mood and i get all stressed! But i do get some good, cheerful days with the girls!
I have noticed I do get some more quiet time (kind of) since they've grown up, when they play together but that's once in a blue moon where it's quiet to be honest. I have noticed Elliw's development such as speaking, walking etc is a little behind than what Mia was at her age but I think the reason for this is because Mia does most things for Elliw so Elliw doesn't/didn't need to learn to ask but she's getting there slowly!
Do you have more than one child? How do you cope?