Breastfeeding Journey | 1 Month
Friday, 19 August 2016
I've decided to start writing about my breastfeeding journey each month as I am hoping to breastfeed until Freddie is at least 1 years old, unless he has weaned off before then. I am lucky that I am a working from home mum and get the chance to breastfeed Freddie for however long I want and for however long he wants to also. From when I found out I was pregnant with Freddie I just knew I wanted to breastfeed this time after formula feeding my girls.
My only reasons for formula feeding Mia was I felt too young, I had just turned 17 years old and to me it didn't feel right. I guess I don't really have a reason not to have breastfed Elliw but I felt it was easier. I was suffering with depression as I was pregnant with Elliw and I am glad in a way I did formula feed but in ways I regret not deciding to breastfeed her. I knew that if we ever had another child that it would be our last because three just seemed right for us. Then, we found out I was pregnant with Freddie. From day one I knew I wanted to breastfeed.
Through my pregnancy I was worrying about breastfeeding as I didn't know what to excpect. I had one 10 minute chat to a midwife on the phone about it but that was it. I had no other support from any midwife other than chatting to a close friend of mine about any thoughts or problems I had. When I gave birth to Freddie he was put on me skin-to-skin for a while and after a few hours I was told I could start feeding. The midwife did help me and showed me how to latch him on and then she left the room for us to have one-to-one time. The following day a midwife asked me if I had breastfed before - I told her no - She then told me I was breastfeeding like a pro! So I must of been doing something right?
As the month has flown by, Freddie has grown loads and he now weighs 11lbs 8oz! So I guess my milk is doing him good since he is piling on the pounds from his birth weight of 9lbs 2oz. The breastfeeding this past month has been a challenge at times because he cluster feeds but otherwise it has been really good. He latches on well and he feeds for a good 30-40 minutes but sometimes it can be for an hour, especially if he decides he just wants to play around but cries when I move him.
My experience of breastfeeding Freddie is totally different than when I formula fed my girls. Mia and Elliw would settle in their cots and sleep for hours a day every day but with Freddie I feel he can be constantly on me and attached to me. Very rarely will he settled with my partner and we are planning to try and make their bond stronger because Freddie will only stop crying when he is next to me or feeding off me. It would be nice to see the father and son bond stronger and the health visitor has given us some tips on how to do so.
Breastfeeding a baby and having two older children to look after can be exhausting most days, especially when I only have 2-4 hours sleep a night. I can wake up crying most mornings because the girls are constantly wanting something but then Freddie is constantly wanting me too. It can be a little bit too much for me at times but I know it will calm down soon and when the girls start back at school it will be better for us all too.
The girls have been really good with my breastfeeding Freddie. They were very confused at the start and I got pretty horrible comments from Mia at the start saying things like "that's disgusting" , "that is horrible" and telling me I should be feeding him from a bottle. It put me down a lot and did make me re think about breastfeeding a little but then I decided to sit her down and talk to her. I told her that it was my choice to breastfeed Freddie and that it is totally normal. I also told her that many other babies get fed the same way as Freddie does. Since our talk she has been fine and hasn't said anything bad since, thankfully.
I am really looking forward to another month of breastfeeding. The bond between me and Freddie is amazing. I love the extra cuddles I get to have because of the feeding. It also makes me feel really good each time he gets weighed with the health visitor and has put on a good weight each time. Something I am really proud of is breastfeeding and I am so glad I stuck to it.