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Archive: February 2015

I'm really worried for when my girls go to Secondary school. I'm petrified if one day they come home and tell me they are getting bullied but also I am so worried in case I get a phone call from the school or a parent to say one or both of my daughters are the bully. I'm not sure which one would be worse. I got bullied through school and you can read my story here. 
If my child was getting bullied I would rather the child come up to me and say. I would really like them to feel that they can tell me anything and know that I am there for them no matter what. I have thought on how I would help if they were ever to get bullied and because I've been through it myself I kind of know how.

1. Listen and comfort.
One of the main thing I would do is listen and make sure I let the child have their say. I would comfort them and make them know they know I am there for them and always there for them when they want to talk.

2. Go to the school.
Sometimes telling the child that you're going to the school to talk to the Head teacher can make it quite scary and probably worry the child a bit more incase the bullies find out and then they will more than likely get bullied even more so the best way to possibly do this is do it in secret. Phone up the school and arrange a meet up with the head and have a chat.

3. Move School.
You really don't want it to go to far so maybe changing schools might be a good idea. A fresh start and away from the bullies.

Have you got any tips?

I have had many people complain to me that I post too many photos on my Facebook account. I really don't care how many photos I post up of my children. I haven't heard people complaining of girls posting photos half naked and photos of themselves up constantly.
The reason why I post photos up of my girls is because I love taking photos and I love too look back and watch my children grow through photos.
I'm so proud of both of my girls so why shouldn't I be allowed to post photos of my girls. I take a lot of photos of my girls and upload them on my laptop so why not show them off?

Do you share a lot of photos online?
Even though my girls are still very young we all know time goes so fast. Before i know it they will be in Secondary school and the one thing i am so worried about is for them to get bullied or even being the bully. I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

When i started Secondary school i felt so nervous. From my previous Primary school there was only 7 of us in the class and 5 or 6 of us went to the same Secondary school. We were all put in seperated registration classes which i meant i needed to make new friends. I was a very very shy girl and found it quite difficult to interact with people. I was quite a big girl then too (bigger than i am now) and i do think that is one main reason i found it hard to make friends. However, i started to make friends and for the first 2 years it was hell as there was always arguements with me and a friend and other 'friends' talking behind my back and just being really fake and nasty towards me. I remember crying my heart out to my Dad saying i wanted to move school. Obviously, i was his first child and it was new too him too. I'm glad i stayed and didn't let them people get what they wanted. We started back in Year 9 after Christmas and i had lost ALOT of weight. I went down to a size 10-12 and a weight were i was normal for my age and height. I'd noticed a lot of people's attitude changed towards me. However, that soon changed.

I remember one day i was sitting on the outside benches with my 2 friends and these girls in my year came up to me and told me to move because they wanted to sit there, i told her no and just ignored her. The next thing she had flung her bag at me and shouted something to me. She dragged me off the bench and i got up and tried to hit my bag at her but i missed completley. They all laughed. The next thing i remember i was on the floor getting punched, hair pulled and kicked. They laughed at me. People watched, it was literally one of the worst days of my life. Writting this now is making me have tears in my eyes. I walked to the reception by myself with my hair everywhere and a lot of my hair had been pulled/dragged out too. The Deputy Headmaster came down and spoke to me and he said he will have to listen to her side of the story too. In the end, absoloutley nothing happened. She was not suspended or even detentioned. I was devastated she got away with it.

Another time i remember I was a little late for an R.E lesson so everyone had gone into class already, i can't remember to why i was late however as i was down the corridor this 'boy' about 2 years older than me came close to me and touched me down below. I have never said this to anyone only the headmaster of the school. I remember going into the R.E class and feeling numb. I felt sick. I was in two minds of going to tell the headmaster but in the end I did. I remember going into his massive office and sitting down accross to him and having to repeat the story to him. The 'boy' did get suspended for 3 days.

I had my 4 best friends who sadly I don't see now but the people they were around on our breaks i really really disliked some. There was this one girl who I won't name but she was just plain nasty, calling me names all the time and making fun of me every single nearly but i look back now and I'm thinking why did i get upset about it? She only did that to me because she didn't have such a great life herself.

Forgetting all that, one day i really can't remember how this started but it was in the last 2-3 years of school. These bunch of people at school in the same year as me, a mix of boys and girls they literally made my last few years left of school HELL. I had a couple of slaps here and there, i had them following me down corridors coming up to me face, calling me all kinds of names. They tried to make me feel very small and they did. It even happened outside of school. I would get it over Social Media sites and outside if they saw me in town. I tried to just pretend I was still happy and didn't care but inside I was hurting so much. I cried nearly every single day, I did want to end everything, i started to hurt myself and it got me even more less confident. I hated going to school. I remember it got really bad one day and i pretended I was ill for a couple of days, which was a big mistake because all they did was carry on and worse too. Luckily, it did stop when we left school and moved on to College.

I really don't know how I will cope if one or both of my children get bullied in school. I am really dreading it when and IF it comes to that one day which i am really hoping it won't.


Never would I have thought I'd be a mother of two at the age of 22. With my eldest being 5 years old and my youngest nearly 3 years old they are quite close age. I remember when I found out I was pregnant with my youngest it was a huge shock and if I'm honest I had no clue what it would be like looking after two children. I'd only had one child before so the main thing that really scared me was how was I supposed to share my love with my first born?! I would think to myself 'how was that possible'. I was really scared I wouldn't love my second child. I fell into depression when I was around 30 weeks pregnant and having Obstetric Cholestasis didn't help either. Mia had only just started sleeping the whole night and with my condition I was loosing so much sleep - so it made me feel much worse through the day.
When Elliw was born my love was instantly shared between both children. Having that first cuddle was amazing. The first two weeks I was over the moon and so happy, I didn't care waking up to her in the night for night feeds and I loved every single minute. After having Mia I was in so much pain I could hardly walk but having Elliw you wouldn't of thought id given birth, it was so different even the midwife was surprised how happy I was and how everything was.
With their ages being so close, Mia was only 2 years and 3 months old when Elliw was born. We had to buy double the nappies, double the wet wipes or triple the wet wipes and nappies actually since Elliw constantly pee'd and with Mia's Chronic Constipation. I'd bought a double pram which also turned into a single pram when Mia went to her dad's. I am so glad I decided to go for a double pram, I had a few people telling me not to and it was a silly idea but I proved them wrong! Mia in my eyes was still too young to be walking around by herself and I can't drive so I had to take bus trips so having a tandem double pram was a life saver! Eventually Mia did come out of the pram obviously and we decided to just put Elliw into a single pram.
I would hardly ever go out by myself with both girls because I would be so scared in case one of them decided to do a massive strop in front of everyone. Especially Mia since she was going through the phase of fist fighting me basically! Her temper was so bad at that time, thank god she has cooled down now.

As they were getting older, I can't say it was getting easier because it wasn't. They were both going through different milestones. When Mia was going through a phase of hitting, punching, bitting and pinching me Elliw was at that stage where she was copying everything and that is when Elliw had got the hitting from. When Mia was at that phase it was so hard and it was quite scary at times to leave them by themselves for a bit because Mia would lash out at Elliw sometimes. Luckily she did stop what she did, I still have it now and then but it's more of just answering back now.

It got a little easier when Mia started playgroup. She had started April time so she only had a couple of months then it was Summer holidays so it was having both of them at home again for an extra 6 weeks. It was nice too have that little break from one child.

Having two children of close age can be really hard work especially that they both go through different milestones but at the age they are now, it's not as hard since Mia is in full time school and Elliw is in playgroup 3 mornings a week. However it can get very stressfull when they both decide they want to play up and fight each other.

To keep myself SANE I HAVE to have my quiet evenings every single night. Putting the girls to bath and bed isn't really a problem here so i'm quite lucky. Mia went through a stage where she would not settle at all until about 10pm-11pm and Elliw had her full whole night sleep at 7 months but she still wakes up most nights atleast once or twice, sometimes more! It can get very tiring if you get a sleepless night but having that quiet evening to myself really does calm me down and I love the quit evenings where I can catch up on all the soaps.

How do you cope with having 2 or more children?
This has been the last week of getting everything sorted. I feel so stressed and I really can't wait to reach Thailand and just relax. I've actually been dreading for Friday as I know it is the last full day that I can get everything done before we go. I still have a friend to visit and my partners grandmother too visit too! What hasn't helped this week is doing the school runs. In total it takes around 45 minutes to get to school, pick her up and walk back. Sometimes a little longer with getting them settled back home, such as giving them their snack and getting the TV on ready for them so I can go and start something else. It really has been a busy week.

Monday.
On Monday Mia had a day off school - as school closed due too snow. So I did manage to do a lot of things that day and the girls really did behave. It was a busy but easy going day. We spent a bit of time outside in the snow before it all melted in the afternoon!

Tuesday.
Elliw was in playgroup 9-11 and if i'm honest those 2 hours go so fast. I come home, have a cup of tea and breakfast then the next thing its time for me to go out again and pick her up. Elliw had her haircut 11.15 and then a friend came over with her little girl and they had lunch here. Mia was in after-school club until 5 so I decided to lay all the clothes on the bed ready to pack. We went out for food that evening for my partners birthday.

Wednesday.
I wasn't feeling 100% Wednesday morning so I relaxed a bit in the morning. I had a hair appointment at 1pm so I took Elliw to my partners mothers house and she had Elliw until 3.45pm. However, my hair appointment didn't finish until around 2pm so I came home, tidied my hair up a bit then went back out to get Mia from school and take her for her hair appointment at 3.15pm. When we came home I managed to tidy the toy room but not long after Elliw came home. I did a bit of cleaning afterwards whilst the kids were having tea and i went to Slimming world that evening - I lost 4lbs!

Thursday.
Again the same as Tuesday Elliw was in playgroup 9pm. Luckily my partner managed to take the girls to school for me at 9am so i came on the laptop and paid all bills and updated a few things on the blog before i had my breakfast. By the time i came to sit down it was nearly 10.15am which meant i only had about 15 minutes to chill out again. I went for a walk to my partners aunty and uncles house which was a nice change as it's the evenings we usually go. We stayed there for about an hour then came home for lunch and tidying again. My Nain and Taid came over just after picking Mia up from school 3pm and they were here until around 5pm.

Friday.
I wrote this blog post on a Thursday so this day hasn't come yet but we are planning and hoping that my partner can have half-day with work tomorrow, take the girls too school so i can do a big clean to the house and make sure everything is ready. Picking Elliw up from play school 1pm then too see my friend for a bit and then go and see my partners grandmother before picking Mia up 3! So another busy day.

As you can see, it's been a busy day. It hasn't helped doing school runs all day ever day and not feeling 100% either. I think a part of it is nerves kicking in.


For the past few weeks I have been looking around for Summer clothes in for our Holiday and it has been so difficult. We've looked in shops and online, I managed to get a few things and a few things from the sale in Matalan one weekend. However most Summer clothes are only just starting to come out in some shops, typical or what! We are all sorted now anyway. It felt really good that I was getting all one size clothes for myself. I wanted to buy things that I could wear for Summer time here too, so I've got quite a few things now ready to go.

I am bringing a few baggy dresses, playsuits and trousers but I think the main things I will wear and feel comfortable in is 3/4 leggings and a short sleeved top! We will see.


It's been a while since I've written an update about Mia's development so I thought this would be the perfect time to write one. I really can't believe how much Mia has grown up to be a proper little lady. Her personality really shows now. She is such a kind-hearted and caring little girl. She loves her baby cousin Osian when she sees him, it's a shame they live quite far from each other so she doesn't really get the chance too see him often. She is a fantastic big sister to both of her little sisters.

She really does remind me of myself when I was a little girl. She absolutely loves writing and pretending to pay 'school'. She has so many notebooks big and small and they are all full of writing and drawings. Every single night when she is in bed she plays school in bed, I can hear her from downstairs pretending she is her teacher from school - it is beyond cute.

Mia is a real Mammy's girl and always has been since she was born. When I look at her I still can't belive I am a mother to a 5 year old little girl!

I am so proud on how much she has grown and how much of a clever little girl she has become.

Until next time,

Lots of love Mam xxx

Elliw's development has changed so much the past few months. I really can't believe she will be 3 next month. Where have the years gone?!

Elliw goes to playgroup 3 times a week now and I am hoping she can get space for 5 days a week after she turns 3. We will get back from Thailand 2 days before her birthday so we will only be doing a family get together for her birthday plus she is still a little too young to hire a place for a big birthday party.

It's mad too think she will be in part-time school in September and full time next September. Her speech is coming along very well, she still has to go and see a Speech Therapist because she is behind for her age but she is trying her very best and is doing fantastically well too! So proud of her.

Elliw loves playing with baby dolls and just like her big sister Mia she loves drawing. Elliw's not shy at all around anyone. She is such a confident little girl.

Can't wait too celebrate her 3rd birthday.

Until next time,

Lots of love Mam xxx
I would like to wish my lovely partner a huge happy birthday!
 
I really couldn't of asked for a better father for my youngest child and couldn't of asked for a better step-father/role model for my eldest daughter. I also couldn't of asked for a better boyfriend. Thank you for everything. Hope you have a lovely day and night :)
 
We all love you too bits. x
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 


Californian Mum in London



I woke up this morning about to get ready for the usual Monday morning, getting the kids ready to take Mia to school! I really could not be bothered, I was so tired. When I woke up I thought it was about 3am in the morning. My partner told me it was white outside, I had a look and I couldn't see much because it was still pretty dark since it had only just turned 7am. I decided to go back to bed for a bit but I was wide awake then. My partner went off to work and the girls came up into bed with me and I was trying to find out if the school was open or not. I had another look out of the window and I could see that the road leading up too the bridge that we walk over was covered in snow so I decided not to risk taking her to school, plus I didn't fancy pushing a pram in the snow either. Mia was super excited having a day off school.

Both girls were so excited when they saw the snow coming down again. Mia was so convinced that Elsa (from Frozen) was using her magic powers and giving us snow! She repeated it a few times. After a lazy-ish morning for the girls and a busy morning for myself, I decided to have a break and took the girls out to the back garden so they could play with the snow. I really can't wait once the garden is done properly it will look so much better and more ideal for the girls to play in. We are making little snowmen and throwing snowballs at each other which was such a laugh! Elliw kept screaming with her high-pitched scream every time Mia threw some snow at her, it was so funny!

I'm not a big fan of snow but today it was really nice. Plus it has all melted now! Which is what I like! I love watching it come down and playing in the snow with the girls a bit. I hate it when it stick all day/night and turns into ice the next day. When the girls came in they had their lunch and played on the iPad and Innotab for a bit then they went to go and play in the playroom together. They have been so well behaved today. I couldn't of asked for a better day. It's been such a nice change having both girls at home all day.

Did you have snow where you are?

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